Real Concerns for Christians Concerning Children

I came along this blog discussing David Benatar’s book, ‘Better Never to Have Been…

http://merecomments.typepad.com/merecomments/2007/03/dont_be_born.html

I’d like to highlight two comments…

 

“If one is born but not saved, then yes, it’s better not to have been born. I will have no children, as I cannot live with the idea that my child might suffer infinite pain for all eternity in God’s eternal torture chamber (and no word-twisting about how God doesn’t run Hell….it’s there because he lets it exist).

And if Calvinism is right, then it is doubly cruel and selfish to have children….chances are your progeny will have been created for the express purpose of feeling God’s wrath…you will probably birth, nurture, and raise a child whose sole and only purpose is to suffer indescribable torment for ever and ever and ever.”

Posted by: Dan | Mar 14, 2007 9:13:31 AM

and…

 

“Not an athiest, and not a troll, and I’m not “attacking this site” (is that what you think when people post things you disagree with?)…I’m just reacting to the question, which has bothered me all my life.

Is it better not to exist, or to exist in Hell? (And I don’t think anyone willfully chooses an eternity of agony….we do actions that will lead there based on our own shortsightedness and inability to do anything else)

If we are born broken and sinful, and will go to Hell unless saved, then why is it such a stretch to decide not to bring additional broken, sinful, Hell-bound people into the world? We can try to show our children the way, but we cannot force them to be saved. I’m saying that I personally cannot face the idea of raising and loving children only to see them in Hell. Which, it cannot be denied, is a very real possibility. (And while I’m undecided about Calvinism, that view seems to reinforce my feeling)

I think the ultimate selfishness would be to have kids for my own joy and benefit knowing that their fate might be worse than not having been born at all.”

Posted by: Dan | Mar 14, 2007 8:09:43 PM

 

Seems pretty logical to me. And anybody who says never existing is worse than spending an eternity being tortured in hell, just isn’t thinking very hard. But that’s exactly the argument some folks make. Check out the blog, read the thread, and tell me what you think!

A Heartfelt Rant From An Anonymous Mother (Phew!)

I think I regret having my children I have no escape I am a prisoner in my own home I have no way fing solitude I am trapped. I secretly wish that someone would deam me unfit as a parent and take them I hate myself for this. I would never hurt them but I can’t even talk on the phone or use the restroom in peace there is no privacy my husband thinks that there is no reason to be away from the children I feel like am losing myself to there incessant whining and crying God please just kill me I am miserable I tell my husband and he blows me off I am not allowed to put them in daycare I can’t even clean my house without them huddling around me to complain that the other one is doing something wrong or the oldest bringing me the baby to hold when i am trying to get her to understand that she does not have to be stuck up my arse all the time am I insane for wishing my kids would dissappear for a day? I don’t get any respect in my own home the children run the house. I am here to serve them and clean up their huge messes. God, Please make it stop I see no light at the end of the tunnel.

Having Kids Can Be A Big Mistake

No Kids Site

Kim Kenney BellaOnline’s Married No Kids Editor

Some Parents Regret Having Kids

Isn’t it interesting how often we hear that we’ll regret not having kids someday, and yet no one ever tells an expecting mom that she might regret her decision? Regretting parenthood is taboo in our society, and few people are willing to admit that they wish they didn’t have kids.

I am always dumbfounded when people continue to pressure people who don’t want children into having them. Why would they encourage someone who doesn’t want kids to bring a child into this world?

Dr. Phil recently did a show on women who “can’t stand being a mom.” Some of these women even let their children know that they regret having children. They were afraid of becoming abusive parents, they resented the time parenthood required, and they blamed their kids for their unhappiness. What a horrible environment to grow up in!

Of course, no child should be made to feel like they weren’t wanted. But immediately, I question why these women had children in the first place.

Could it be because society bombards us with the message that WOMEN MUST HAVE CHILDREN? And that there is something wrong with us if we don’t want to become a mother?

What if these women had realized, in advance, that they didn’t have to become a mother to have a meaningful life? What if they had found a support network like Married No Kids? Would they have had kids anyway if they realized they had a CHOICE?

Of course, there are those who truly did want children, and the reality of parenthood just wasn’t what they expected. I don’t know what to say about that. I know the reality I see in my friends’ households now, and I don’t want that to be MY reality – EVER!

If you’re on the fence about whether or not to have kids, then you absolutely shouldn’t have them. At least not right now.

You can always change your mind down the road if you decide you do want kids. But it’s a lot more difficult to admit after the fact that you don’t really want the kids you have. It isn’t fair to them, and you can’t change your mind once you’ve chosen that path.

One From the Grandfather of Antinatalism

If children were brought into the world by an act of pure reason alone, would the human race continue to exist? Would not a man rather have so much sympathy with the coming generation as to spare it the burden of existence? or at any rate not take it upon himself to impose that burden upon it in cold blood.

                                                                                                                               Arthur Schopenhauer

I Guess There’s Not Enough Irony in Peoples’ Diets Nowadays

I was wandering through a thread on another site that was discussing one of my posts, and I found this…

“I watched Children of Men again today, and it brought home to me, forcibly, just what a bleak and ugly place this world would be without hugs and kisses and delightful faces, and the chatter and laughter of children. A sombre thought.”

Of course, what sails right over this person’s head is that this ‘bleak and ugly world’ she refers to was created by the children of previous generations, most of whom I’m sure at one time hugged, and kissed with their delightful faces, chattered, and laughed. That is, before they learned to rape, and pillage, and shoot people, and blow up cafes with explosives.

There’s one particular scene near the end; the protaganist holds the only newborn child in the world in his arms, and picks his way between opposing forces in a firefight. For just a moment, the fighting ceases, as the child is beheld by both sides in quiet awe and reverence. But the fighting resumes before the guy even gets out of the area. It never ceases to amaze how people so easily manage to disconnect from the whole picture, picking out little parts here and there to make their cases. The writer is worried about the sad state of the world without children, without realizing that the world as depicted in the film, IS the real world RIGHT NOW, and is the way the world always has been, and the world is FILLED with children!

In the same thread, just above the quotation I posted, our commenter had this to say, speaking of death…

“It comes to everyone. I’ve often said that I would die if one of my children died before me, but I know that won’t happen. I will be severely wounded, but I won’t die. Dying is part of life. There is no escaping it. Children will take drugs and get into fights and cause you much heartache, but the bottom line is that they are, more often than not, worth it.”

Is it only obvious to me where her focus of concern lies here? It’s all about how the child’s problem or death would affect HER!

Never forget; procreation is an ultimately selfish act, and it’s always selfishness at the expense of an innocent third party. Always.

Don’t have kids!

There Are Rewards

I’ve been talking to one of the young women at work, one of those who ‘wants to have a baby’, about why the idea is so wrong. The other day she told me, “you know, you’re REALLY convincing me that having a baby isn’t a good idea”. I bring this up only to illustrate that, sometimes, reason prevails, even in the face of so-called biological imperatives. Slavery was a world-wide phenomenon, accepted by just about everybody as the natural order of things, until finally the underlying recognition of what we were actually doing came to the forefront of our consciousnesses, and things changed. The same goes for exploitive child labor.

Or did they really change? Ostensibly, yes; at least, in the so-called ‘enlightened’ cultures. But think about it-when we are urged to bear children for ‘the good of mankind’, or for ‘the good of the state’, because “who will prop up the economy? Who will take care of our old people? Who will we hide behind when the bullets start flying, and who will carry civilization into the future, to fulfill the vision of all those who’ll be dead by then?”, then can’t it rightly be said that we are breeding new generations of slaves? And let us not fool ourselves into thinking that we’re doing the unborn a favor, bestowing unto them the ‘gift’ of life. Even under the best of circumstances, we always procreate for OUR reasons, never theirs; the unborn have no interest in coming to life! How could they? They don’t exist; they’re simply figments of the imagination until AFTER we bring them into being, calling them out of nothingness to fulfill our emotional needs, do our work, fight in our wars, etc. Oh, and of course we encourage them to have children of their own. That’s what they call multi-generational slavery, just like they did down on the plantation not so very long ago.

Think about it.

Another From The Onion

Ant Farm Teaches Children About Toil, Death

PASADENA, CA–Wonderco, a Pasadena-based educational-toy manufacturer, unveiled its new Playscovery Cove Ant Village Monday, touting the ant farm as a fun, interactive way to teach children ages 5 and up about unceasing, backbreaking toil and the cold, inescapable reality of death.

 

Enlarge Image Children learn about the cruel reality of pain, toil, and death with the Playscovery Cove Ant Village.

“Your little ones will have a front-row seat as worker ants labor, day in and day out, until they inevitably die of exhaustion, their futile efforts all for naught,” Wonderco spokeswoman Joan Kedzie said. “A Playscovery Cove Ant Village, complete with stackable tiny ant barns, see-through ‘Antway’ travel tubes, and connecting ‘Antports,’ is your children’s window into the years of thankless, grueling labor that await them as worker drones in our post-industrial society.”

Billed as “the fun way to teach your kids to accept their miserable fate stoically,” the ant farm retails for $14.95.

“The ants work very, very hard,” said Youngstown, OH, 9-year-old Dylan Munns, who will someday work in the same grim Hormel meat-packing plant where his father now toils, as his father did before him. “They dig tunnels and carry heavy stuff all day long. Then they do it all over again the next day.”

“They all look and act the same,” said Newark, NJ, 10-year-old Darnell Booker, who, like Munns, will one day play the role of blue-collar worker in a society that rewards collectivism over individualism. “And there’s no escape.”

According to Kedzie, the ants, which come separately from the farm, are bred in New Mexico and mailed directly to Playscovery Cove Ant Village purchasers. Within days of arriving, a majority of the ants die at the hands of the small children responsible for regulating the temperature, humidity, and food supply in their delicate pseudo-ecosystem.

Even under optimum conditions, Kedzie said, the ants survive no more than 20 weeks in the farm. As a result, children are assured the chance to contemplate the inescapability of their own mortality.

 

 Ant carcasses pile up beside a little plastic tree.

“My ants came in the mail, and I put them in my ant farm all by myself,” said Molly Whalen, 7, of Springfield, MA. “Some were stuck to the bottom of the tube, and I tried to make them move by dunking them in water, but mommy said they were dead forever.”

It is normal for a certain percentage of the ants to perish in transport, Kedzie said.

“As it says in the official Playscovery Cove Ant Watcher’s Guide, ‘Don’t worry if some ants didn’t make the long and bumpy trip to your mailbox, kids, because we send along more than enough to get your ant farm up and running,’” she said. “‘Besides, when some of your ants arrive dead, you’ll be reminded that the spectre of death hangs over every creature on this Earth!’”

The lesson that the ants’ labor is all in vain becomes clearer as time passes. During the first two to three weeks, the exclusively female worker ants are extremely productive, building an elaborate system of tunnels and hills amongst the miniature green trees and red plastic houses dotting the interior of the plastic dome. However, because neither male ants nor a fertile queen is provided with the Playscovery Cove Ant Village, making reproduction impossible, the farm is doomed to extinction from day one.

“The social structure of an ant colony is extremely complex, with individual members occupying such castes as soldier, messenger, and larvae attendant,” said Penn State entomologist Dr. Gerald Dudek. “At some point, the Playscovery Cove ants become cognizant that their hierarchical structure has been stripped away, rendering their already near-meaningless existence totally futile. There seems to be a breaking point at about the 22-day mark when the dejected ants begin to die off en masse.”

At this point, Dudek said, the ant farm enters what is known as the “death-pile phase.” A spot is chosen by the worker ants to deposit their dead, and the burial mound steadily grows as the few remaining ants devote more of their time to gathering and burying others.

“It was really weird,” said Jessica Lurman, 14, of Savannah, GA. “The ants were, like, really careful to put all the dead ants in this one big grave until there were, like, only four left. Then, the next morning, three of the four were lying with the others in the big pile, and the last one was dead over by the plastic farmhouse thingy. It must’ve died right after it buried the second-to-last ant.”

Rick Brannan, CEO of Wonderco, said his company’s ant farm was initially marketed as a fun way to teach children about life, not death.

“About a year ago, we re-examined our entire line of nature exploration toys–the ant farms, firefly lanterns, butterfly keepers, and ladybug jars,” Brannan said. “What we found was surprising: Despite the fact that, 100 percent of the time, these toys resulted in the death of the living creatures caged inside, parents continued to buy them for their children. It was then that we realized that the suffering and death must be part of the attraction.”

Added Brannan: “Here at Wonderco, arbeit macht fun!”

Source: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28444

It’s Funny, Cuz It’s True (Well, The Irony Is True, Anyway)

Doctors Find New Way To Prolong Meaningless Existence

March 25, 1998

 ITHACA, NY–In a stunning medical breakthrough, a team of Cornell University biogeneticists announced Tuesday that it has developed a revolutionary new synthetic hormone that retards the human aging process, enabling individuals to extend the churning, meaningless void known as life by upwards of 20 years.

 

Enlarge Image A researcher examines a cell injected with Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase, a radical new anti-aging hormone that promises to add years to humans’ pointless lives. Inset: The hormone is tested.

“This remarkable new hormone will enable millions of people to live longer, healthier lives,” said Dr. Marlene Peretz-Worthington, head of the Cornell team. “Once the substance wins FDA approval and is made available to the general public, the hellish emptiness of our spiritually blank lives should be that much more inescapable.”

According to Peretz-Worthington, between 1990 and 1998, 250 test subjects between the ages of 68 and 81 were injected bi-weekly with Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase, an experimental DNA-modifying hormone that “freezes” the genetic codes that regulate aging. In all 250 subjects, the drug slowed down the aging process by at least 30 percent, adding years to their futile, purposeless existences.

In addition to retarding aging, Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase has proven effective in fighting disease. Experts cited the example of Gus Dermott, a Charlotte, NC, dockworker whose nightmarishly empty life of grueling menial labor nearly ended when he was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s Disease. When administered high doses of the hormone over a seven-month period, Dermott showed such rapid improvement that doctors now estimate he will be able to return to his soul-crushing, spiritually hollow toil within as little as three months.

“I was bedridden, just waiting to die,” Dermott told reporters. “But now, they tell me I can go back to that same dock where I’ve already wasted almost 20 years of my life, and waste the rest of it while waiting to die there instead.”

Gertrude Anne Klingbell, an 89-year-old Alzheimer’s Disease sufferer from Shaker Heights, OH, had equally miraculous results using the hormone.

“I used to be blissfully unaware of my pathetic, pitiable state,” said Klingbell, whose Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase treatments have restored her mental faculties. “Now, the doctors say I can live on without any purpose whatsoever for years, trapped helplessly within the bleak prison of shattered dreams and blasted hopes that has been my life.”

According to Cornell’s Dr. Sunil Gupta, Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase also has applications in treating cancer.

“The cancer patients who participated in our study expressed a deep sense of hopelessness and despair, not only over the disease, but the horrifying awareness of the random injustice of the world that contracting the disease instilled in them,” Gupta said. “Now, that sense of misery in the face of an uncaring universe can be stretched out over many years of grueling family crisis, despair, painful chemotherapy and surgery, instead of mere months.”

Despite its early successes, Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase has yet to be proven effective in fighting some life-threatening diseases, diseases which still may offer us eternal respite from the screaming vortex of unending blankness that defines the human condition. But as medical science continues its pointless fight to indefinitely prolong the existential void of modern life, the revolutionary new hormone represents the most promising development in years.

“Thanks to Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase, the wasteland just got a little bigger,” said American Medical Association executive director Dr. Gordon Puhl. “We’re all very excited about the new drug and its potential to imprison patients–even if only for a few more desperate, agonizing years–in lives they can make no sense of, see no point in, and find no worthwhile purpose for. As we slowly learn to accept that our pretensions to relevance and meaning are but so many fragile, illusory constructs which crumble like sandcastles in the face of the universe’s utter indifference to our plight, one thing is certain: Noexitoxythalynucleothylinase and other such medical advances will ensure that, for each of us, young and old alike, terminally or mildly ill, our suffering is far from over.”

Source: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28913

One Hindu’s Take on the Wrongness of Procreation

I found this, and thought it was interesting. Enjoy…

 

Hello to everybody who has made an effort to read my essay. “Conceiving a Child is a Sin” is the 4^th Chapter of my essay “In God We Trust”. It is a revolutionary theory, supported with spiritual and logical explanations. To read the complete essay “In God We Trust” please click here http://blog.myspace.com/86792970

If you agree with my views or have something constructive to say, you are welcome to drop me a line. If you don’t, please DON’T let me know about it. I have not posted this essay with the intention of getting into a senseless never ending debate or argument.

P Srivastava

dontconceive@hotmail.com

 

 

Conceiving a Child is a Sin

 

I am of the firm conviction that conceiving a child is a great sin. The highest goal for a soul is to attain liberation from mortal existence, that is, to break free from the cycle of births and deaths. Giving birth is the exact opposite of liberation. A couple who conceive a child are directly responsible for encaging a soul in a mortal body. If we ourselves aspire for liberation, how can we justify the trapping of another soul in a body? By giving birth, people imprison a soul in a mortal body without thinking of the suffering they will put it through. We have no right to give such a bondage to a soul (At this point, I would like to make it very clear that I am not trying to imply that I will never father a child. I will try my best not to, but then, everyone can be lured into committing a sin, and I am no exception).

Life is not a bed of roses. Suffering is a part and parcel of everyone’s life. Some have more of it, some less, but everyone goes through it. To battle with innumerable terrifying problems of different types is part of man’s life and he cannot escape from them. He will be thrown in the midst of baffling trials, may have to face natural calamities, and undergo punishment for his ‘past’ misdeeds. From the very moment a person takes birth, suffering is his constant companion. Everyone has diseases and illnesses in life. Everyone goes through emotional suffering. And life is a constant struggle. People have to start their struggle right from childhood, from their school days. Then college, if they reach that far. Then finding a job; then a life partner; facing the loss of near and dear ones. And all the while we are enslaved by the body and its demands, be it hunger, sleep, sex, etc. Everyone has to work in order to maintain his body. Even breathing is work. Our body’s metabolism is constantly at work. We have to supply it with food so that it can keep on working. And we have to work so that we can obtain that food. But if our soul is not bound in a mortal body, it will be totally immune to all pain and suffering.

Before conception, no one knows what exactly the future of his offspring will be. It could be physically handicapped; it could be mentally deformed; it could be blind. And then, as life progresses, any kind of misfortune can strike it. Either or both of the child’s parents can die, when their child is still young, leaving an irreplaceable void in the child’s life. They could be separated. The child could end up being a total failure in life. It could end up in prison.

No one comes to this world on his own will. It is the will of the parents which gives birth to the child. They are solely responsible for bringing it into existence. And whatever hardships a person faces in life, whatever pain or sorrow comes his way, his parents are entirely to blame for it.

Some people tell me that if all humans stop reproducing the world would come to an end, and that seems like a very frightful idea to them. I tell them that this planet would actually be far better off without humans. Besides, Earth has existed for millions of years; humans appeared just about a hundred thousand years ago. Humans are part of this planet. We don’t own this planet.

Once I was discussing my theory of not conceiving with a lady and told her that if someone has a child, it could be born blind. She said that is a one in ten thousand chance. I told her that the phrase “one in ten thousand chance” is used in gambling, so basically it means you are gambling with someone’s life. She had no choice but to agree. By reproducing we are actually gambling with someone’s life. Do we have a right to do so?

I feel the only difference between humans and animals is the fact that we can willfully abstain from reproducing. In all other ways, we are not much different from animals. We are just more intelligent than other animals and have used our intelligence to improve our life with comforts and sensory pleasures.

If one believes in transcendental spiritualism, which says that the soul should be freed from the cycle of births and deaths, then to understand that giving birth is the opposite of liberation is more of a logical conclusion, something akin to a mathematical equation.

I am sure that during the course of civilization there would have been people who would have propounded this theory. Maybe their ideas did not get too popular – there were not many means of spreading writings and ideas to the masses in ancient times. Maybe a lot of people who could have written about it chose not to, for reasons best known to them. The views and teachings of lot of spiritual and philosophical people were propagated orally by them, and were written and compiled by others, thus diluting the content and authenticity of the original. It was said that the Buddha was preaching childlessness. One does not need to read between the lines to understand what the Buddha meant when he said that birth is accompanied by suffering (Buddha’s noble truth to sorrow{suffering}: birth is attended with pain, disease is painful, death is painful, union with the unpleasant is painful, separation from the pleasant is painful, unsatisfied craving is painful).

There is an ancient Indian story about eight Vasus (liberated souls or demigods) who played a prank on a holy man. The holy man was angry at them for playing a prank on a mortal, they themselves being liberated souls. He cursed them to spend one life as humans on earth. They were terrified by this curse. It shows how dreaded human life is for a liberated soul. After they pleaded for mercy, the sage agreed to reduce the curse for seven of the Vasus. Seven of them would be killed, or liberated the day they were born. The only punishment they would have to suffer would be the nine months in a human womb. Hearing that they would be killed the day they were born, the Vasus were ecstatic and thankful to the holy man for reducing the severity of the curse. The eighth Vasu, Prabhas, who was the main culprit, would live a full life on earth in a mortal body as a punishment for his misdeed. The eight Vasus were born to king Shantanu and his wife Ganga. Ganga killed the first seven children the day they were born. The eighth child went on to live as Bhishma, who played a pivotal role in the Indian epic the Mahabharata. (The killing of the children by Ganga seems to explain to some extent the verse “What is night for all beings is the time of waking for the disciplined soul; and what is the time of waking for all beings is night for the sage who sees{or the sage of vision}” – B.G. II 69).

The Mahabharata is a very integral part of ancient Indian and Hindu culture, and the holy book of the Hindus, the Bhagvad Gita is part of the Mahabharata. This story clearly illustrates that life on earth is a punishment. It is surprising why this point has never been noted and stressed upon through the ages. Moreover, there is a verse in the Bhagvad Gita, in which Krishna describes knowledge as “Indifference to the objects of sense, self effacement and the perception of the evil of birth, death, old age, sickness and pain” (B.G. XIII 8). This verse clearly states birth as being evil. Millions of people have read the Bhagvad Gita through the ages, and not just Indians. It is very surprising that no one has tried to infer or comment on this verse.

It is an act of lust which gives birth to a child. The result of an act of lust can never be right or holy.

 

I would like to clarify at this point that I am not saying sex is bad or wrong. I mean if sex results in giving birth, that is wrong. But it is a sensual act, and if one wants to be childfree he / she would have to ensure sex doesn’t result in conception. Sex is one of the strongest instincts all living beings possess and I don’t feel anyone should try to suppress their desires as long as they don’t end up harming anyone.

Death is certain for one who is born. In effect, when we give birth, we automatically gift death to that person as well. Therefore a person who gives birth is also responsible for murder. These ideas may sound absurd and crazy to many people. But then, at some point down the ages acts such as thievery and robbery must have been considered normal, and if someone termed them as being sinful it might have sounded absurd and crazy to many. Throughout history it has been the norm for conquerors to lead barbaric campaigns of mass murder and plunder without any qualms. The yardsticks and values pertaining to sin and morals differ from people to people. Even today there are many who see no wrong in committing various heinous acts. There are many criminal tribes in India in which stealing and robbing are family traditions. People have to be taught what sin is or what is right and wrong – they are not born with knowledge ingrained in their minds. One needs to open their mind and think rationally and logically. Most people get very defensive when I tell them that conceiving a child is a sin. They are not willing to make any attempt to understand this theory or to listen to the reasoning behind it with an open mind. They vehemently oppose this theory outright, mainly because they are too much in love with the idea of having their own children and definitely don’t want to believe that they are committing any sin in doing so. Desire and love cloud our mind and logic.

 

Some people say that by giving birth you are giving a chance to a soul to be born as a human and thus giving that soul an opportunity to seek liberation. Can anything sound more stupid than this? It’s like putting someone in prison in order to give that person a chance to break free.

It is very essential to understand the soul for a person to possess any kind of spiritual aptitude. The soul, if not embodied, needs nothing to survive and cannot face any kind of pain, sorrow or damage – fire cannot burn it, water cannot wet it, a sword cannot cleave it. For a free soul, a human is like a perpetually sick individual who needs matter in all its three forms (gaseous, liquid and solid) in order to survive, just as a sick man needs medicines to survive. If we see someone who needs regular medical treatment, like insulin injections or dialysis, we pity that person. We don’t realize that all of us need to breathe air, drink water and eat food in order to survive – we are all patients, pitiable ourselves. A liberated soul needs none of these things. We should not pass on this disease called life to other souls by reproducing.

To some people my views on life sound negative and pessimistic. They feel that life is full of joy and pleasures, it is beautiful and is to be enjoyed. Ignorance is bliss - that is all I can say for them. Sensory pleasures are the biggest delusion for humans. That is why we humans enjoy far more pleasures and means of sense gratification than animals. It is because humans would understand the futility of life, since they have the intelligence to do so if these sensory pleasures were not present to fool us and to make us fall deeply in love with life. A person who feels that the ultimate goal in life is to indulge in sense gratification is an immature fool. Just as we don’t enjoy playing with children’s toys as we grow older, when one attains spiritual wisdom he loses interest in enjoying any kind of sensory pleasures. We enjoy pleasures which are appealing to humans when our soul is embodied in a human body. But if our soul is to be embodied in a vulture’s body then the taste of carrion will be pleasurable for us, and human pleasures and comforts will be of no interest or use to us. It is only when the soul is enlightened that it attains the wisdom to rise above worldly delusions.

I feel that if someone does not conceive a child, whether willfully or due to reasons beyond his or her control, that person breaks the cycle of bondage and is thus entitled to liberation.

If, however, someone is really keen to have a child they should bear in mind certain things before conceiving. It will still be a sin, but a sin of a slightly lesser degree.

First of all, before planning a child, the parents should ensure that the child will have a financially secure future and a comfortable upbringing, in a healthy society. Those people who are monetarily poor or who live in poor and underdeveloped countries commit the greatest sin by giving birth to a child. Such a child is brought up under miserable conditions and has a dark and gloomy future lying ahead of him. In a country like India, marrying and having children is something everyone just has to do. But life in India is virtually like living in hell. The country is very backward and underdeveloped. There is poverty and misery all around. A person working in India would earn in a month what a person in the USA would earn in a day, doing the same kind of work. The result is a sharp contrast in the standard of living. Public amenities like medical facilities, state transport, water supply, sewage & sanitation, electric power, schools, colleges, etc. are very limited, and whatever there is, is literally in ruins. There is widespread corruption, unemployment, and human rights abuse. The weather is also very hostile and most people cannot afford air-conditioners. Poor people lead a life akin to that of animals. Most of them cannot even afford a square meal for themselves everyday. But still these people continue to give birth to children, and not for a moment do they realize the injustice they are doing to innocent souls by doing so. When they see their children suffering and leading a life of drudgery, they put the entire blame on destiny. It is not destiny, but their own will that gives birth to a child, and they are solely responsible for its destiny. Giving birth to a child and then blaming destiny for its misery is like shooting a man and saying “It was his bad luck that he had to die, so I am not to blame for it”.

In this respect many humans are far worse than animals. Animals in the wild, if they foresee a shortage in food supply or feel that their habitat is under threat or is no longer suitable, refrain from reproducing. But there are lots of humans, especially in third world countries, who being well aware that they cannot afford proper food, shelter, clothing and other basic needs for their child, still feel no compunction in reproducing.

Once in New Delhi, I saw a boy of about fourteen being bullied by seven older boys. There was a police jeep with three policemen standing nearby, and this boy came running towards it, with the older boys following him. He asked the policemen to save him from the older boys. They, in turn, said that he had provoked them. Instead of protecting him, one of the policemen slapped the younger boy repeatedly, and started checking his pockets for money, blatantly, in front of everyone. Whatever the boy had, the policeman snatched from him. This incident took place in the capital of the world’s largest democracy, in the heart of the city, at a busy crossing at rush hour, witnessed by many a mute spectator. Such incidents are rife in India. This is the state of security and human rights ordinary citizens of India enjoy. Still, people continue to give birth to children in such a country.

As it is, giving birth is a sin, but one should not accentuate the sin by giving birth despite knowing that the child will have a bleak future. After all, giving birth is not compulsory. We humans can realize this, and these days birth can be prevented even after conception.

The break up of the Soviet Union in the early 1990s coupled with the end of communism saw a sharp fall in the standard of living of most Russians, resulting in a marked decline in the birth rate. In terms of intelligence and education of the general populace, Russia is far ahead compared to third world countries – that is probably what helped many Russians to opt not to have children in adverse circumstances.

There are lot of world leaders, philanthropists and organizations working for the upliftment of the downtrodden all around the globe. A huge amount of time, money and effort is spent in this endeavour. If they can make the poor understand the wrong in conceiving children without having the means and resources to support them, their task would become much easier. It is far better to prevent the problem from taking birth rather than allowing it to crop up and then trying to busy oneself in attempting to cure it.

Another point people should bear in mind before conceiving a child is the level of their capability. By the time a person becomes mature enough to have a child, he is well aware of his abilities and shortcomings. A person who is not very capable and successful in life should avoid conceiving a child. A child inherits mental and physical qualities from its parents, and chances of giving birth to an incapable child are higher if the parents themselves are incapable. A lion will give birth to a lion, and a lamb, to a lamb. A donkey can never give birth to a lion. If someone has some weakness or is deficient in some respect, he should see that his spouse can make up for it. If a man who is considerably underweight should marry a woman who is also underweight and physically weak, the result will be that their child, too, will be underweight and weak. Similarly, if a man of limited intelligence marries a woman of his kind, they will most probably bear an unintelligent child. A person could be a coward, or very lazy, or of a weak moral character. All these traits can be passed on to his offspring. If a person cannot find a spouse who can make up for his deficiencies, he should desist from having a child. He himself has suffered because of his weakness. Why should he make another soul suffer for the same?

A person suffering from a serious disease or medical disorder should also refrain from reproducing. It is not a very pleasant experience for any child to have a sick parent. Moreover, if it is a hereditary disease, like diabetes, it can be passed on to the offspring.

The ingredient most essential for our survival is the air we breathe. Humans can live without water and food for hours and days but cannot survive without air for more than a couple of minutes. People pay lot of attention to the quality and hygiene of the water and food they consume, but they don’t seem much concerned about the quality of the air they breathe. All around the world most of the capable and successful people live in big cities, where the air is by no standards pure and clean. They bring forth children to breathe in polluted, unhealthy air. Does it prick their conscience - or are they too insensitive to even give it a thought?

Sometimes I wonder – if people possessed the ability to communicate with the soul and it said it did not wish to be born to them, or born at all, would they still go ahead and trap it in a mortal body?

A child’s life is directly linked with that of its parents. If the parents are successful and prosperous, the child will have a comfortable upbringing. But if the parents are poor, life will be very difficult for the child. If a parent commits a sin and is punished for it, indirectly the child also bears the brunt of the punishment. If God punishes a man for his sins by snatching his wealth or crippling him, his children will be affected as well. Why should children suffer for their parents’ misdeeds? Is this God’s way of meting out justice?

A question that often baffles me is ‘Why do people have children?’ For their emotional happiness; to have someone they can call their own and depend upon; someone who can help them in their work and look after them in old age; someone whom they can pass their wealth on to; someone who will carry on their generation. These are all very selfish motives. People put a soul through such torment and suffering to fulfill their selfish desires.

I consider emotional attachment to anyone, whether father, mother, brother, sister, son, daughter, wife, lover, friend, etc., to be nothing but foolishness. A person would have had near and dear ones in his previous life. But in his current life, he will not remember who his parents or children were in his previous life. Nor would he remember his current family members in his next life. In his next birth, his soul could well have been in the chicken that lands up on his son’s dinner table!

 

When I am talking about not being emotional it is from the spiritual point of view, I don’t mean a person should be cold and insensitive. But once a person attains spiritual enlightenment then all worldly wants and desires are effaced. Very few people manage to attain spiritual enlightenment, and I am not there either. For the uninitiated it would not be easy to understand or appreciate the nuances of Hindu spirituality. We all have different philosophies and beliefs and my intention is not to offend or contradict anyone’s beliefs

 

 

 

Chem Sickle Speaks…

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Just pulled this little fishy from the internet sea…

If life is not good enough for theists without make-believe,
why do they subject their children to it?
Why force another being,
who will likely be just as disillusioned with reality as his/her parent,
to labor through life and ultimately die (which is usually awful)?
Why not use protection, or abstain from sex?
Is it a selfishness, a lack of responsibility, or just further delusion?

Good question, Chem Sickle.